Crystal Jade La Mian Xiao Long Bao

23 April 2010:)

I had been tolerating all the unfair treatment all these while. No matter how awful I felt, I still choose to carry on because I believe things will turn better in the future.

Things had been getting out of hands and I have never had a proper talk to anyone regarding this problem. Being in a relationship, I believe both parties contributes and working hard together hand in hand to build the relationship. Somehow, mine don’t turn out like this. Despite having complaints on and off, I didn’t really share with anyone how I felt genuinely from the bottom of my heart.

I admitted that I was never nowhere near a prefect girlfriend in my previous relationship due to my selfish characters. The cycle was just give and refused to return at all. Naively , I thought god will be always so kind to me and bless me with wonderful boys.

Life isn't so perfect after all.

Finally, my karma came. I had never treat a guy so nicely or give in so much in my entire life not even my parents. The amount of effort that I placed in this relationship can easily win the accumulated efforts that I made in my previous relationship. It's not even on the par.

Typically arrogant me choose not to reveal how awful I felt throughout. I feel like im suffocating. Deprive of freedom and concern. The concern you gave was pressurizing and somehow it turned out to be mental stress . That's explained to my friends about my unexpected mood swing regularly.

I always believe in mutual trust and respect in relationship which I feel that is the key of run a relationship. Somehow I was proven wrong again. Despite having “trust”, you set so much restriction and invisible rules into my daily life. I believe in freedom and stuff.

Many would say im femalist.and I would say YES I am one of them. I have my strong believes and view on stuff. I hate people neglecting my views or ignoring it and my parents are already one of them. Life was pretty manageable with only my parents doing that to me. Ever since I been together with you, my views and feeling are conveniently neglected. Because you choose not listen to my views and selfishly refused to open up your heart to accept who I am.

Nothing hurts me worse than this. In a superficial point of view, a guy should be smart and rich to be a partner in order to provide a decent life isn't it? It's worse to live with a person who do not love you rather than accept your characters. Your actions had proven me right that you had never accept my characters or personality from your bottom of heart. I find it pointless to speak to you at all when my girls told me to do so. I had tried countless time in fact. You just argue your way throughout.
Accepting a person's character is the act of love not changing her characters. I don’t know how to say this to personally at all because you will just argue your way through. For those who know me well enough, explaining is never my strength.

Taking today as an example, I’m having a headache and feeling very tired. Instead of showing some concern, you're too obsessed with reprimanding me for not keeping my promise. Why cant you be flexible enough ? I really cant stand you anymore!

Sad to say I'm not longer the bubbly shishi that everyone knew. back to top?